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<blockquote data-quote="MelaninWarlord" data-source="post: 62492" data-attributes="member: 428"><p>A lot of men aren’t invisible because they’re unattractive; they’re invisible because they’re boring.Many men struggle with basic conversation. They can’t present their strengths in a natural or appealing way, and often they lack experiences worth talking about. Their daily lives give others little reason to feel curious or impressed. Fixing this usually means working on two fronts at once. The first—and most important—is learning how to talk to people in general, not just women. Too many young men ask how to talk to girls, but that skips over a more basic skill: learning how to talk to human beings. Conversation is a muscle, and it has to be exercised. That means talking to your friends more and spending more time around other people, full stop. If the only person who will talk to you is your mom, start there and work outward. The point isn’t who you’re talking to, but that you’re talking at all. You need to learn small talk, idle chatter, storytelling, and how to listen and respond—in short, how to be more socially engaged. If you don’t know where to begin, imitation helps. Model yourself on an extroverted person you like—a friend, a writer, a podcaster, even a fictional character. Having a concrete example is often more useful than abstract advice. You don’t need to become fake or cartoonish. Just inch yourself closer to that model. The goal is simple: get comfortable speaking, listening, and responding. Before worrying about the opposite sex, learn how to talk to people.</p></blockquote><p></p>

[QUOTE="MelaninWarlord, post: 62492, member: 428"] A lot of men aren’t invisible because they’re unattractive; they’re invisible because they’re boring.Many men struggle with basic conversation. They can’t present their strengths in a natural or appealing way, and often they lack experiences worth talking about. Their daily lives give others little reason to feel curious or impressed. Fixing this usually means working on two fronts at once. The first—and most important—is learning how to talk to people in general, not just women. Too many young men ask how to talk to girls, but that skips over a more basic skill: learning how to talk to human beings. Conversation is a muscle, and it has to be exercised. That means talking to your friends more and spending more time around other people, full stop. If the only person who will talk to you is your mom, start there and work outward. The point isn’t who you’re talking to, but that you’re talking at all. You need to learn small talk, idle chatter, storytelling, and how to listen and respond—in short, how to be more socially engaged. If you don’t know where to begin, imitation helps. Model yourself on an extroverted person you like—a friend, a writer, a podcaster, even a fictional character. Having a concrete example is often more useful than abstract advice. You don’t need to become fake or cartoonish. Just inch yourself closer to that model. The goal is simple: get comfortable speaking, listening, and responding. Before worrying about the opposite sex, learn how to talk to people. [/QUOTE]

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