- Joined
- Jan 30, 2026
- Messages
- 404
- Thread Author
- #1
Today I'm out chainsawing firewood like a functional adult when this neighbor lady turns into a human golden retriever; darting in, grabbing tiny sticks, 'helping' like her life depends on it. I'm swinging a running chainsaw and have to keep killing the engine every 5 seconds because she's in the blade path doing interpretive dance with kindling.
Flashback to last week: my favorite cat does the exact same shit — sticks his adorable head right under the axe swing. Instantly panic "NO KITTY DON'T DIE TODAY" heart attack. But this woman? I gave zero fucks I felt nothing for her safety. Just mild annoyance and a silent prayer she would trip into the way as I "accidentally" turn her into modern art.
She 'rewards' me later with dinner: some Instant Pot abomination. Dump truck of random shit + 'seasonings' = gray slop soup. Modernity's greatest hits, women (and some men) convinced that yeeting 12 ingredients into a pressure cooker equals 'gourmet home cooked meal.' Nah dawg naaahhhh, that's just lazy pile of shit in a bowl. I ate it politely because I'm not a monster....
The point? There is none. Just me being forced to remember modern women are like toddlers with adult bodies: gotta be in the middle of everything 'helping,' can't sit still, and their idea of contribution is a $200 gadget turning trash into more trash.Not all of them, sure. But the type? It's a splinter in the brain. Worse than a quirk chungus. At least quirk chungus just posts cat memes and Marvel references.Vent over. Back to chopping wood alone. Peace.
P.s The best chiefs in the world are men. Here are some of my meals I have cooked. I'm sure I'll be called out for my shit cooking but at least it's not an insta pot. Sorry for the pointless rant.
Flashback to last week: my favorite cat does the exact same shit — sticks his adorable head right under the axe swing. Instantly panic "NO KITTY DON'T DIE TODAY" heart attack. But this woman? I gave zero fucks I felt nothing for her safety. Just mild annoyance and a silent prayer she would trip into the way as I "accidentally" turn her into modern art.
She 'rewards' me later with dinner: some Instant Pot abomination. Dump truck of random shit + 'seasonings' = gray slop soup. Modernity's greatest hits, women (and some men) convinced that yeeting 12 ingredients into a pressure cooker equals 'gourmet home cooked meal.' Nah dawg naaahhhh, that's just lazy pile of shit in a bowl. I ate it politely because I'm not a monster....
The point? There is none. Just me being forced to remember modern women are like toddlers with adult bodies: gotta be in the middle of everything 'helping,' can't sit still, and their idea of contribution is a $200 gadget turning trash into more trash.Not all of them, sure. But the type? It's a splinter in the brain. Worse than a quirk chungus. At least quirk chungus just posts cat memes and Marvel references.Vent over. Back to chopping wood alone. Peace.
P.s The best chiefs in the world are men. Here are some of my meals I have cooked. I'm sure I'll be called out for my shit cooking but at least it's not an insta pot. Sorry for the pointless rant.
