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Message: <blockquote data-quote="Sovereign" data-source="post: 45703" data-attributes="member: 10">According to the authors, three changes mark a successful shift from Stage 1 to Stage 2:Change #1: Shifting language. The Stage 1 individual stops expressing that life is fundamentally unfair, and he starts to say that his life specifically is bad. Change #2: Tired resignation. The authors explain he’ll often become resigned: He’s unhappy that his life hasn’t worked out yet, but he sees that it can.Change #3: Social shifts. When he moves toward Stage 2, the Stage 1 individual leaves behind relationships with people at Stage 1.Develop a Coaching Habit The Coaching Habit: Develop a daily habit of coaching your team members. Specifically, Stanier recommends asking good questions and listening more than you speak. Three of Stanier’s questions apply best to Stage 1:“What’s on your mind?”—This gently opens the conversation.“Anything else?”—This encourages people to say things that might be difficult to say.“How can I support you?”—This communicates that you hear, see, and want to help this person.By using these questions well, you can build a relationship with a Stage 1 individual who’s likely never had support, and you can guide him to a healthier way of living.Stage 2: Resigned MediocrityThe authors explain that Stage 2 culture is an apathetic mood characterized by passivity and disinterest in the work at hand. This culture is common at places such as the post office, chain retail stores, and other menial jobs.In a Stage 2 culture, everyone fixates on the negatives, allowing their circumstances to define them. Since negativity is contagious, this creates a downward spiral that yields a perpetually unhappy atmosphere. As with Stage 1, Stage 2 has two key markers:Marker #1: Commiserating language. In a Stage 2 tribe, the authors say that people commiserate about things such as how management mistreats them, and they often bemoan corporate heavy-handedness.Marker #2: Tenuous relationships. Since Stage 2 features mainly commiseration, people’s relationships don’t grow beyond the support of shared griping.Paths to Stage 3: Inspire AmbitionTo coach individuals to Stage 3, find the few who are ready to level up and work with them one-on-one using the authors’ three steps: Step #1: Speak with Stage 3 language. This will help the Stage 2 individual learn and absorb the Stage 3 attitude, and she’ll begin to recognize her abilities to succeed.Step #2: Show the individual that you value her. Since the Stage 2 individual has often become disillusioned with management, you need to gain her trust. The authors recommend that you get to know what she does and what she’s accomplished. Step #3: Encourage two-person relationships. The Stage 2 individual needs to develop better connections to move up. Encourage her to seek new friendships, especially with people who are at Stage 3. Two main changes mark a successful shift from Stage 2 to Stage 3, according to the authors:Change #1: The Stage 2 individual starts using Stage 3 language. Instead of expressing that her life sucks, she’ll start to recognize her own potential—and she’ll express that with language like, “I’m awesome, I can definitely succeed.”Change #2: The Stage 2 individual assumes the mood of Stage 3. Now that she’s begun to recognize her own abilities and develop her confidence, the Stage 2 individual will assume the competitive attitude characteristic of Stage 3. </blockquote>

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