I know I always write about this, but here it goes again: the self is an illusion. This means that the sense of agency you seem to have when you interact with others is simply an illusion. It is always, absolutely always, the unconscious mind that is in charge of interacting with other people. It is also wrong to think that just by starting to “psychoanalyze” yourself you will magically become a better person or become more “conscious”. False, as I have already said: the unconscious mind is always in control. Even when you "psychoanalyze" yourself, that analysis is still the unconscious mind playing with itself. There’s no "you" outside the system observing it. Although, the idea is that the more you integrate aspects of yourself, the chances of the unconscious mind sabotaging your life will decrease, and this includes how you interact with women!
You interact from something deeper than ego... but it's still not “you” acting, because the ones in chargue of interacting with other people are traumas, past conditioning, deep-seated beliefs in the unconscious, your relationship with your father, your mother, and so forth.