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(1) Seeing through the illusion of the self. Understanding that what you call “I” is just a recurring pattern of thought that can be modified, since identity is a fragile construct. Therefore, we progressively reduce desire by observing with mindfulness, without adding more narratives to what is already happening.
(2) A complete psychological deconstruction. Deconstruct all unconscious beliefs about love so that new beliefs about it can be injected into the system. Beliefs such as “I am already complete” or “I am the love of my life” may seem ridiculous on a conscious level, but what you don't realize is that the structure of identity is narcissistic by default, as it is built precisely around survival, so when that thought structure tries to demand love from women, from the decentralization of the self, we see that these are recurring patterns of genetic propagation based on thought. It's not about what you carry consciously, but unconsciously given that our purpose is simply reducing suffering and so it is important to question things such as "I do not deserve love" not because they represent some ultimate truth, but simply because they increase suffering, and affect what is called the "self-concept". If you have a poor "self-concept", it is possible that there will be a bigger tendency to engage in self-destructive behaviour when the animal ego feels attacked.
(3) Injection of a new set of beliefs and values. From a pessimistic and empathetic perspective, existence is something that should not be, and nature is just a machine for creating suffering by creating beings that function under illusory selves that seem to desire things. From a framework like this, beliefs begin to be injected that allow a freedom from genetic hierarchies that place value not on appearance or status, but just because we are simply sentient beings deserving of love and respect.
(4) Language is simply a tool, so use it wisely. Inject healthy beliefs into the system that generate self-compassion. It doesn't matter whether they are true or not, but whether they reduce suffering.
(2) A complete psychological deconstruction. Deconstruct all unconscious beliefs about love so that new beliefs about it can be injected into the system. Beliefs such as “I am already complete” or “I am the love of my life” may seem ridiculous on a conscious level, but what you don't realize is that the structure of identity is narcissistic by default, as it is built precisely around survival, so when that thought structure tries to demand love from women, from the decentralization of the self, we see that these are recurring patterns of genetic propagation based on thought. It's not about what you carry consciously, but unconsciously given that our purpose is simply reducing suffering and so it is important to question things such as "I do not deserve love" not because they represent some ultimate truth, but simply because they increase suffering, and affect what is called the "self-concept". If you have a poor "self-concept", it is possible that there will be a bigger tendency to engage in self-destructive behaviour when the animal ego feels attacked.
(3) Injection of a new set of beliefs and values. From a pessimistic and empathetic perspective, existence is something that should not be, and nature is just a machine for creating suffering by creating beings that function under illusory selves that seem to desire things. From a framework like this, beliefs begin to be injected that allow a freedom from genetic hierarchies that place value not on appearance or status, but just because we are simply sentient beings deserving of love and respect.
(4) Language is simply a tool, so use it wisely. Inject healthy beliefs into the system that generate self-compassion. It doesn't matter whether they are true or not, but whether they reduce suffering.
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