My ability to enter an elevated social state is so fickle and temporary

[6ft4]

I notice that when I achieve some degree of success in life or move somewhere that provides novelty excitement, I can get better social results (defined as getting slays since I will never have a proper male social circle) from feeling like I'm in an elevated state but it evaporates extremely quickly

Examples would be: when my crypto portfolio hit a new all time high, I went on my first night out in months and couldn't take a rejection the slightest bit seriously, ended up getting a slay

I got back on roids for the first time in years and gained 7kg quickly and felt a lot more imposing and got a slay on my first night out

I moved country recently and on my first night out I slayed the first girl I approached, I went out 2 weeks later (last night) and while I got a number and a few girls who tolerated my approaches I feel like I was getting regular rejections as if my elevated state from the novelty of moving had already died down in the space of 2 weeks.

I would have to assume I am extremely low dopamine naturally as feeling a sense of reward from socializing that is triggered with drugs is extremely hard for me.
Whenever I get a decent slay I feel like I'm in an elevated social state the following day and feel far more NT
When I have gone a few weeks without achieving anything new to spike my feel good senses, I return to square 1 as a social failure who is unwanted by most people I attempt to interact with

 

[Sovereign]

I notice that when I achieve some degree of success in life or move somewhere that provides novelty excitement, I can get better social results (defined as getting slays since I will never have a proper male social circle) from feeling like I'm in an elevated state but it evaporates extremely quickly

Examples would be: when my crypto portfolio hit a new all time high, I went on my first night out in months and couldn't take a rejection the slightest bit seriously, ended up getting a slay

I got back on roids for the first time in years and gained 7kg quickly and felt a lot more imposing and got a slay on my first night out

I moved country recently and on my first night out I slayed the first girl I approached, I went out 2 weeks later (last night) and while I got a number and a few girls who tolerated my approaches I feel like I was getting regular rejections as if my elevated state from the novelty of moving had already died down in the space of 2 weeks.

I would have to assume I am extremely low dopamine naturally as feeling a sense of reward from socializing that is triggered with drugs is extremely hard for me.
Whenever I get a decent slay I feel like I'm in an elevated social state the following day and feel far more NT
When I have gone a few weeks without achieving anything new to spike my feel good senses, I return to square 1 as a social failure who is unwanted by most people I attempt to interact with

For every gain, we endure a lost. Sure, you made an effort and you succeeded and yet what did it amount to? In this case, you had it and you lost it, you tried it and the results didn't add up to what you may have hoped. You had a high, and now you are back to an elevated state. You did no wrong, but don't forget what it is, momentary pleasure via small gains.