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I've did this after a 1 week streak of meditation - i was always skeptical about things so i did it mainly for ADHD treatment
I didn't really dedicated myself to it - 1h/day at max
After playing with my knife i've got bored of it - i tried to sell it, buy if you know it takes some time
In the meantime i've been researching different schizoterics discussions - most sources linked dhyana with improving intuition or something like that
Outta boredom i've decided to gamble it instead

Now keep in mind that i've never won 50/50 before - even small Ws were kinda suprising to me
It was a series of pages like that - i've never lost my depo and came out even / 60-70% winrate for now
It was a series of black n red nothing special, until..

so the difference here when i've placed bets on red / black it was what comes to my mind FIRST
The only thing that changed to me after dhyana is basically this - 0 overthinking and going w the flow
I've never betted green randomly b4 - its just this time i've got strong urge to do so
It felt like panic attack when i would just place my cursor to red or black
Now streaks is something ethereal to me to, my past self would trick me to not go with the first thing in mind
NOTICE that there was Ls too , these are just my sshots
Ive used the same bet - i didnt rely on goytingale schemes or get greedy
took a break for a while - i've felt into trance so time passed rq
it was basically meditation with open eyes (idk the definitions, just randomly come with the same conclusions somehow )
But it's basically dharana ig

now just as i decided to quit i've placed these ones
The thing is i wanted to go balls deep on those - atleast my gut sense told me so
but then my "rational" goybrain told me that it's all just a series of lucky events - you won 2.63% bet, now you want to place it all on 0.003% turd?
Now this post is too long already so ill keep updating the thread
I've always tried to remain sane but whatever belief system i had, they tend to fall apart - so why bother?
I didn't really dedicated myself to it - 1h/day at max
After playing with my knife i've got bored of it - i tried to sell it, buy if you know it takes some time
In the meantime i've been researching different schizoterics discussions - most sources linked dhyana with improving intuition or something like that
Outta boredom i've decided to gamble it instead
Now keep in mind that i've never won 50/50 before - even small Ws were kinda suprising to me
It was a series of pages like that - i've never lost my depo and came out even / 60-70% winrate for now
It was a series of black n red nothing special, until..
The only thing that changed to me after dhyana is basically this - 0 overthinking and going w the flow
I've never betted green randomly b4 - its just this time i've got strong urge to do so
It felt like panic attack when i would just place my cursor to red or black
Now streaks is something ethereal to me to, my past self would trick me to not go with the first thing in mind
NOTICE that there was Ls too , these are just my sshots
Ive used the same bet - i didnt rely on goytingale schemes or get greedy
took a break for a while - i've felt into trance so time passed rq
it was basically meditation with open eyes (idk the definitions, just randomly come with the same conclusions somehow )
But it's basically dharana ig
The thing is i wanted to go balls deep on those - atleast my gut sense told me so
but then my "rational" goybrain told me that it's all just a series of lucky events - you won 2.63% bet, now you want to place it all on 0.003% turd?
Now this post is too long already so ill keep updating the thread
I've always tried to remain sane but whatever belief system i had, they tend to fall apart - so why bother?