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This YouTube video, titled "Lost and Confused In This Life", was uploaded on December 27, 2025, by the channel Shelby Exists And Makes Stuff.
It's a deeply personal, unscripted monologue (about 20-30 minutes long, based on typical transcript length) where the creator, Shelby, openly shares her feelings of profound existential despair, isolation, and hopelessness. She talks about feeling perpetually lost and stagnant in life, with no clear purpose, milestones, or aspirations. Key themes include:
Struggling with self-worth, having been fired from many jobs, and feeling unable to function in society or maintain productivity.
Deep social isolation, rejection, and difficulty connecting with others.
A bleak view of life through an evolutionary lens—seeing herself as "unfit" or at the bottom of the "gene pool," where effort feels futile without innate advantages.
Exhaustion from daily cycles of pain, amplified by holidays like Christmas, and temporary coping through substances.
Doubt about her ability to heal, contribute (even through art), or find meaning.
The video ends with links to her Instagram art page, Shopify store for buying art, and BuyMeACoffee for support/memberships.
As of now, it has around 2,600 views and 200 likes. It's raw and emotional—content warning for themes of depression,
worthlessness, and suicidal ideation (though she doesn't explicitly plan harm, she expresses wishing for the pain to end).
If you're sharing this because it resonated with you or you're concerned, resources like crisis hotlines are available (e.g., in the US: 988 for suicide prevention). Take care.
